dellac said:Oh yes! And on! I fact, due to my propensity to waffle, I have to re-post this response as today's blog.
It's one of the reasons I'm not prolific in writing and posting. When I read something I want to reply to, or have virtual essays of thought on, before I begin to type I have to check my available resources - do I have enough time, will I be interrupted, am I feeling cogent enough... etc ? - then weigh up the costs against any possible return. Don't want to break the bank trying to participate!
Not that it's an odious task to write. I love it. I'm just almost congenitally unable to write a short message. I try. I have another mode, which is something like 'quip mode' (polite term), in which I attempt to say something brief but which is, to me anyway, not serious.
But anyway, if the words start to flow they don't easily stop and I lose sense of time. Then if I get interrupted I have to start the thought process again at the beginning.... As it is, every thought gives rise to tangents I want to follow. But, can't. I mean... must resist!
Ahhhh..... I thought about beginning a blog about discovering the spectrum as an adult, but I worry I don't have the capacity (resources) to post regularly, and there are already some good ones out there anyway. Since plants (and the light shining through them) have been Special Things since my very early memories, and I have such a jungle of thoughts that grow from those seeds, I finally decided to begin mapping that inner terrain from here. This is my trainer-wheel blog.
In the outer world I'm learning to use digital photography to match the clarity and experience of light I perceive subjectively, and (I really hope!) convey the love I experience for my subjects. I am not technically proficient. I expect it will be a long journey!
But it's funny, growing up around neurodivergent folk, I knew we were different but didn't know our kind of different had a name. Not until I had to help my 14 year old son through his own ASD diagnosis. Then the light came on. What still amazes me, is that the world isn't this way for neurotypical folk.How do they survive?
I did read - a lot - to ensure I wasn't just mislead, but I missed Tony Attwood. I'll search out his writing. I decided against a formal diagnosis, because after the process with my son and once I began digging into the lives of autistic folk, I realised I knew more than the specialists I might talk to. I just knew.
It's a little like the taxonomy dilemma we have in botany. For centuries we used evaluations of form and function to create classifications. What is the plant used for? Where does it grow? How does it appear to us? Our concept of a 'species' relies upon an old functional definition. Can they interbreed and produce viable offspring, are they geographically discreet, and so on. NOT ON THE INTRINSIC NATURE OF A THING. Now, phylogenetic revision changes that. We're learning about the true nature of relationships between things.
Anyway, in assessing ASD we rely on an evaluation of dysfunction from the view of observers. Not on the intrinsic nature of a thing. You might guess, I'm interested in The Intrinsic Nature of Things, so I gave the evaluation a miss. In doing so I had to give up a yearning for external validation of all my life's pains. Tough decision, but I made it. :p Might have been a growth moment there.
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